You have to ask yourself if this is going to be fair to the child. It has less to do with you than it will have to do with your child.

So, lets say in 15 years....20 years...40 years even, your child finds out that the person on his/her birth certificate is not their father. I wonder how you'd feel if that were the case.

But im planing to tell my child as soon as he's old enough to under stand that this is not his real dad but he basicly adopted you. && Tell him that his real Dad didnt want you.

So i do know whats fair.

You've only been with this guy three and a half months and already you're planning for him to be your child's father? That's such a short amount of time. Why not leave the father's name blank on the birth certificate and just let your boyfriend be there (if you two are still together) and see how things go?

I think telling your child "your dad didn't want you" is cruel and mean.

I second the cruel remark.
have you ever been told that you were unwanted?
that is a harsh blow to anyone's self esteem,let alone a child's.
It would be even worse coming from a mother.
My advice would be to leave the unwanted comment out and maybe say that the father loves you,he just wasn't ready to be a dad or something along those lines.
You should never(EVER) talk bad about the other parent in front of a child regardless of whether the child even knows the parent or not.

And about the new bf on the birth certificate,I think I would prefer to have noone on the birth certificate.I would never put somebody on my son's certificate that wasn't his biological dad.
And there is a perk to not putting him on,he isn't legally bound to you,if he stays it means he stays because he wants to not because he has any obligations to the child.

As others have said before me, it sounds cruel to tell a child they weren't wanted. You are the mother and you can do as you wish, but this is something your child has to live with the rest of his/her life. While you have nothing to do with their birth father, that child is tied to his/her birth father forever.

Im not going to tell it straight out like that, Ill explain it to it, && Yes i do know how it feels my dad didnt want me, && im living perfectlt fine, && its not that i want him to be the Dad, My boyfriend wants to be the Dad!

Read whatever i told the other girl.

&& actully thr guy that signed mine isnt my real Dad... He's my step dad today.

No, he isn't your 'step dad'. LEGALLY he is your father. He may not be biologically, but legally he is.

uve only been together for a few month... ive been together for someone for years abnd we broke up... if you break up then does this guy knows hes stuck being the babys dad FOR LIFE, child support, everything... your so young and ive been in your position, not to sound mean but honestly id put all the money i have on a bet that u dont end up even marrying this guy... and i only say thought out of everything i have seen with my own eyes, i once thought the same as you and i was in for a rude awakaning when it didnt go the way i thought it would... i cant even see me being with my own babys father for life to be honest... you have to be realistic... leave it blank, then if you even marry this guy he can adopt the baby, and then he will become the legal father... that will be FAR easier then guessing he will be around, and then go through the hassel if he isnt...

so does this mean that you have also changed your mind about putting your fiance on the certificate instead of the real father lagringarican?

I'm just curious because it wasn't too long ago that you were asking the same question,maybe you can give her more insight to this and help her realize the pros and definately the cons of this situation.

Is your boyfriend 16 too? He's only been with you a few months and already he's commiting himself to raising a child that isn't his with a girl he hasn't even been with for half a year yet? That's extremely rash behavior (which is common for a lot of teenagers) and I hope he gives it more thought before the baby is born. It's hard enough being a father so young, but to volunteer to do it for a child that isn't yours before your life has even really begun is extremely risky. I hope, for his sake, that his family talks him out of this.

Why are you so determined to tell your child their father doesn't want them? What's wrong with you? Why would you put your child through that? No mother should burden their child with feeling they're unwanted. Shame on you.

As someone that not only deals with adoption issues but an adoptive father that didn't want me......I completely agree.

Well yeah, But i still call him my step dad cause he aint my biologically dad. Iv never even met my real dad, && Dont really care too.

I dont care about child support.
&& I really dont care about child suppor if i know its not his.
&& Im fithy rich so i dont have to worry about money.
&& Idc if hes not really the child, He already told me if i dont put his name on the birth C then he doesent want anything to do with the baby or me && That's the only way hes goign to be with me. We have been going out for 3 years on and off. i forgot to say that, We just have been going out for
that long since this time.

Huh?

Well actully weve been going out for 3 years on and off, this is just how long weve been going out this time, && My Dad didnt want me either, && It never botherd me because someone else signed my Birth Cer.My Mom was under age and did it by her self. But my boyfriend is 19 &&His Mom was under age having him && Some other dude took care of him besides his real dad it was his Moms best friend, And he calls him dad... So i really dont see the big problem, I asked a simple question if hes allowed to, I didnt ask for yall to give me problems, Iv thought about it && So have we, We have fault about it, && Im not goign to fight about it with him anymore, If he wants to, Then ill let him, && I talked to the real Dad on Tuesday, && He still doesnt want anythign to do with it, && Im pretty sure if he wanted to have something to do with it he would come clean about it, Since his cousin Is my Best friend. okay!?
&& His Mom was a

Well actully weve been going out for 3 years on and off, this is just how long weve been going out this time, && My Dad didnt want me either, && It never botherd me because someone else signed my Birth Cer.My Mom was under age and did it by her self. But my boyfriend is 19 &&His Mom was under age having him && Some other dude took care of him besides his real dad it was his Moms best friend, And he calls him dad... So i really dont see the big problem, I asked a simple question if hes allowed to, I didnt ask for yall to give me problems, Iv thought about it && So have we, We have fault about it, && Im not goign to fight about it with him anymore, If he wants to, Then ill let him, && I talked to the real Dad on Tuesday, && He still doesnt want anythign to do with it, && Im pretty sure if he wanted to have something to do with it he would come clean about it, Since his cousin Is my Best friend. okay!?

how are you filthy rich? you are only 16....your parents might be filthy rich,not you.
do you even have a job?
you say you don't care about child support now but child support isn't for you.It's for the child.Whether you use it or not,it should still be available for the child.Put into a high interest savings account.
I would put the real father on the certificate because he needs to learn that life isn't just going to go away because he wants it to,he had sex he needs to live up to the consequences.
And about this new guy saying he'll only be with you if he's on the certificate,he sounds like a real winner....if someone only wanted to be in my son's and my life if he was on the certificate I'd walk away,I want him to be there because nothing could keep him away.