I suffer from anxiety disorder, and went to see a psychiatrist after my stress and panic attacks caused heart palpitations. The psyciatrist told me that based on some questions that I answered, that I have "bipolar tendencies". He did not diagnose me with bipolar, but put me on abilify along with the Pristiq and Xanax that I was already taking, and gave me Lunesta to sleep at night. I started reading up on bipolar, and here are some of the things that I have noticed about myself.
I suffer from obsessions, and really silly ones, like I will focus on a cell phone, and I must have that particular one, or I will not be satisfied. Once I get what I want, then I usually end up thinking it was a mistake. I also have the same problem with animals. I love animals and they are my comfort, so I will become obsessed with getting a particular animal (right now it is a cockatiel) and it's like an obsession that I must do. All of my animals are very loved parts of the family, but afterward, I wonder if I made a mistake because of course it takes a little bit of time away from my current pets or my children. Its the same with shopping too. Sometimes there is something that I want that I have to have, or I will go on a rampage and buy 10 pairs of shoes in a month. Then dont wear all of them. I have a short temper sometimes, cannot manage money, am constantly worried about whether I am doing a good job at work, or whether I am being a good wife or mother, and I am selfish, for example, if sometimes, if I am sitting on the sofa watching tv, and one of my 2 kids come up and want to play or do something, I prefer to just watch TV. Sometimes I will make myself stop and do something with the kids. I am constantly worried about what other people think about me, or if I say something stupid or if people are talking about me.
Basically, it's like I have obsessions, and when I have them, its almost impossible to stop. I changed jobs beause my previous job was so stressful, so I dont have any health insurance right now, so I cant go back to the dr. I am only on Pristiq and occasionaly xanax right now, because abilify gave me horrible side effects.
I really want to know if I am actually bi polar and maybe I need to go back to the psyc or if there is something else going on with me?
sounds like the dr said,, more tendencies than outright clear cut symptoms that point to bipolar and only that
the most striking indicator of bipolar is going to be massive shifts in energy. days/weeks/months spent low then suddenly mind racing all over the place. and where the mind goes the body quickly follows (unless you're completely exhausted) i once saw someone come into hospital who seemed way more depressed than manic. but mania it was. just had totally overdone it in every way and was spent.
hope this has been some help. i'm no expert. just an exasperated patient like you, also with no proper diagnosis ("depression" does not by a million miles cover all of it)
so i know how you feel about that one. i understand that a diagnosis can validate or explain some weird experiences some of us might get. but in the end you just get past that and want whatever is wrong with you to heal.
if you're worried you need to see a doc quicker than it sounds you are doing. i'm not in the usa, but uk where things totally different dr-wise