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Bipolar for life?

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Hi! I have had a pretty good life but the last 10 years bipolar has really gotten the best of me. During the last 10 years I have had 3 major bipolar episodes. I am now in my 40's. Prior to that I had 3 major episodes in my 20's and 30's. Generally each time I have a major manic episode for about 3 months. I get super active, start talking a lot, usually try some business venture or many business venture all at once, sleep very little, and go on major spending spree's. I mean I spend every penny I have and write checks, max out credit cards, just get totally out of control. At the time I think I am in complete control and that I will be able to "figure" out a way to pay for it all. 8 years ago I got so out of control, it cost me my marriage. 5 years ago I got so far in debt and couldn't even file bankruptcy. I had used up all my credit and had purchased 5 cars and was using them to give to friends to help me with "business". This last year it got so bad and I had used up all my money "helping" others, buying everything in sight, buying everybody's lunch etc... I decided it would be a good idea to sell my car. I thought I had it all worked out, but long story short, I did not. I sold it for payments, not for cash and now I cannot purchase another because my credit is max'd out. This last manic episode started around last October and then the depression part (reality) kicked in around May and I am now at the lowest low I have ever been in my life. Oh by the way I lost the best job I ever had in February.

I knew I had bipolar about 3 years ago and had been on medication very consistently, until October I started feeling a little manic and It just took over and I thought maybe I didn't need the medication because I was "feeling" so good. I am so mad at myself for going off the medication and allowing the disease to ruin my life one more time. Please if you have ever experienced anything like this I would like to hear your story. I have lots more to share but not now. If you think you are bipolar or know you are bipolar, please do as the doctors say and make sure you keep them informed with how you are doing on a regular basis. Also you need to have a close friend or family who can help monitor your condition. You cannot fight bipolar alone because it will beat you.
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