Sweetie I feel for you. You control your thoughts and now is time to take control of them. There are many individuals that live with panic attacks. The key is learning how to control them so they don't control you. I usually do not get into this but you mentioned your dream and I want to give you something else to think about. I firmly believe dreams have meanings. Your dream in particular means this. To dream that you are cutting yourself, indicates that you are experiencing some overwhelming turmoil or problems in your waking life. You are trying to disconnect yourself from the unbearable pain you are experiencing. To see injured wrists in your dream, indicates a loss in productivity. You are in an imbalanced or one-sided relationship. It also implies that you are not reaching out to others enough. Just food for thought. You sound like you have a great support system

Wow, it really is amazing how similar my story is to yours. I seriously understand everything you are talking about. I even began have severe panic attacks around the same time. I look back on the last 7 months and I can honestly say that they have been the worst of my life. I've lost interest in pretty much everything. Like you said, i don't want to go anywhere without an emergency room close by. I tried to go camping with some friends a few weeks back and I had to turn around halfway to the campsite because I was starting to panic (of course my friends don't understand). I have pretty much lost my appetite. I pretty much never feel hungry, and the thought of eating makes me feel sick (my stomach is in knots a lot). My relationship with my girlfriend is falling apart because of all of this. She has been so patient and understanding throughout all of this and I really love her, but I'm so irritable and closed off now that it's not really fair to her. But I can't break up with her because I hate being alone. I constantly wake up in the mornings in a strange dreamlike state. It's like the first hour after I wake up I'm in a daze and still asleep, it's really frightening. I think what is been most frightening and something I think about a ton is the possibility that I'm going crazy. I have to say though that the celexa I'm taking has helped. It took a long time to start working (probably 3 months), and when I first started taking it my panic grew so severe, I couldn't even get out of bed. I'm glad I kept taking it. I think I already told you I was diagnosed with mono months later, and I'm not sure how much of this has been caused by that. If you get on the mono forum and look at "depression with mono" and "strange mono symptoms" and other like postings you'd be surprised at how many people r dealing with severe panic related to this illness, without experiencing the typical symptoms (sore throat, cough, fever, etc.) There has been a bunch of really great books written on the subject and panic/anxiety disorder (mostly cognitive therapy stuff), but by far the best one I have come across is "Don't Panic" by Reid Wilson. It's kind of all about learning to think rationally, because panic attacks are completely irrational (your fear builds on your fear). Also, the doctor put his email address in the book and he was great about getting back to me and answering all my questions. Anyways, I really hope you are staying strong and not defeated. Best, Bart

I am going through the same thing!!!! I wish the thoughts would go away they make me worry more which makes me more anxious!!!! I am actually trying to find something else to worry about or I try to keep myself busy so I won't think about it but I am terrified!!! If it dies not stop soon I am calling my doctor to have him switch me fr celexa to something else and see if it works better.

I know exactly how you feel,I have very bad anxiety and panic disorder and I also think that I am going to die all the time! I dont even like taking tylenol because I think that It will cause some weird side effect that may hurt me. I wont eat or drink anything with caffine or sugar because I think it may give me an anxiety attack! I have gotten to the point that i am scared to be home by myself and i dont want to go anyway where alone! I allways have a fear that i am going crazy or loosing my mind and it is very scary! I too wake up feeling like i am in some dreamlike state and i also feel like that towards the end of the day also, almost like im on drugs but im not, i have been convinced that its due to some illness.