As much as I try, life always finds a way...

I've been searching for work for the last 3 years of my life to no avail. I've rapidly gained weight since I was about 10 years old, I'm at 330 pounds now. I'm stuck here with at home (my parents house) all day, escaping reality through video games. My dad has always been a good provider but along with that came nights of not knowing if I was safe or not. He always drank and put me down every chance he could. Some nights he would get violent and I'd have to lock myself in my room with my mom and my little sister. My mom never listens to me. I've always been there for her. I'll never forget the times when I would go up to my dad and want to fight as a 5 year old after consoling my mom after the crap he put her through. Every time she needed somebody I was there. Anytime anybody needed me I was there with a shoulder to cry on. I went through some severe depression from about 15-20, mostly because I was dealing with my sexuality and I moved. That and everything else. Haven't made any real friends since I moved, mostly people on the internet. People that hardly even talk to me. Even relationships with family never seem to work out because they love me when I'm there for them but could not give a darn about me when I need someone to be there for me. As much as I try, life always finds a way to keep me down it seems.

I know that was all over the place but I typed it as I felt it. I need someone to talk to and some advice. I don't know what to do anymore. I don't see much of a point in living if this is gonna be me the rest of my life.