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Anxiety in 9 year old boy

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My son is 9 and suffers from a fair bit of anxiety.
Hes a strange mixture as he is very confident and outgoing but can suffer from separation anxiety and is very emotionally sensitive.

He has for a few years had a very bad anxiety based swallowing problem (his throat closes up, feel tight and he cant swallow solids, he was on liquid diet for a long time) which is thankfully improving slightly. But new issues keep popping up.. For instance he sighs and breaths weirdly and says he cant breathe and get a full breath, even though the doctor has checked him out and hes fine physically. he does it at bedtime or when hes worried. Today he is worried the world will end due to the Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland! He also makes a fuss over me leaving his room when he goes to bed, and is convinced i will leave th ehouse ( i have never done so nor would I!)

Can anyone suggest ways to help him live a less anxious life? I suspect it could be heritary as i have always been a worrier myself
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First Helper brombo
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replied April 24th, 2009
reply to 9 year old anxiety.
My son has been experiencing some high anxiety as well. I chalked it up to the prep. for the state testing, but now it's continuing and I'm heartbroken for him. I've been doing some searching on the 'net and I'm sure his diet is a part of it. I've been giving him the "kid version" of Omega 3 (the gummy vitamins), and that's helped a lot, but not totally. But getting him to eat anything has always been a struggle, let alone "good" food. Any suggestions are highly appreciated!
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replied April 19th, 2010
My 9 year old son is also refusing to eat its an every day struggle. He takes his vitamins and we put him on nutrition drinks. He also worries about everything ..it doesn''t help he gets picked on at school for being little and that bothers him to. Its tearing my heart out because I don''t know what to do. He is so scared to eat that when we tell him he has to eat something he will chew it until its running out of his mouth and cry because hes scared he will choke.. I am so hopeful there is an answer out there to help get my son back to the way he used to be .. i''m so worried about him.
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replied May 21st, 2010
Never assume anxiety is all pyschological. Rarely does anxiety or depression stand alone as they are often times *symptoms* of underlying condition. Of particular concern is age, when a young child exhibits anxiety, a medical cause should be the first sought out. The case of my 9 year old having anxiety was resolved when it was found out he had a thyroid issue as both hypo and hyper thyroidism can and do cause anxiety. My own issue was Graves disease undiagnosed as a child and teen and I wouldn't wish that suffering on anyone. Deep breathing and positive thoughts simply do not work when a medical condition is at the root. Low iron, vitamin B-12 and a host of other endocrine concerns and vitamin deficiency may be at play along with neurological concerns found in spectrum disorders, mild autism and ADD/ADHD. Sadly many Drs are not well versed on Endocrine issues ( often reading testing results incorrectly assuming that *in range* means fine) nor regularly test for vitamin deficiencies. The other issue is a lack of definitive proper ranges for children. Much research still needs to be done. If the issue be psychological in nature then no harm done in getting full medical testing, however, assuming emotional issues are simply personality disorders or pyschological in nature can be dangerous as physical issues will persist and worsen. If autoimmune disease is an issue in close relatives, be suspicious...very suspicious!

Take heart, anxiety can be controlled whether medical or psychological in nature. Its about doing your research, getting all medical results in hands, questioning and being persistent.

I wish you both the best!
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replied June 26th, 2010
My son's only a few years older (11) but was doing some of the same things I did when I was growing up like shutting down and being noncommunicative even when he's asking for help. His classmates make fun of him tons because he has a tendency to cry pretty easily and is an easy target. It kills me to watch him like this because it took me many years to work though it.

My wife and I saw a doctor recently and he diagnosed my son with GAD and ADHD. We're doing the ADHD medication but I'm morally opposed to medicating children with psychological drugs at a young age. I'm doing this program at the recommendation of a friend. So far he's been responding well but we're only on the first week. We're also giving him some vitamins just in case it's something physiological, as a doctor recommended.

I think the biggest thing I've done to help my son so far is just be there for him and listen to him no matter what. My parents would laugh and belittle my problems growing up, but if you're kind and try to work through his complaints without being dismissive it will help him tons too.

Hope that helps!
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replied July 6th, 2010
I would check into Sensory Processing Disorder. My son has this and has alot of anxiety
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replied December 1st, 2010
My son is also experiencing anxiety. he wants to sleep with us or his sister routinely and describes bad dreams. He gets very down and hard on himself if things don't go his way. He is very sensitive and gets bullied easily. He was dx with ADD 2 months ago and we hare trying ritalin currently. He has a poor diet and will only a few foods. I am having him evaluated with OT next week due to this for sensory issues and also seeing a psychologist about his sleeping problems and hopefully get some help. I am heartbroken that our young boys are having such emotional issues.
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replied December 6th, 2010
My 9 year old is experiencing the same things. He cannot go to sleep on his own or sleep the whole night in his room. He says he can't sleep without an adult in the room because he gets so scared. He is begging for me to help him but I just don't know what to do. His pediatrician hasn't done a thing to help him. Should I ask her to request blood tests for him? Any advice? Thanks!
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replied January 6th, 2011
Firstly make a list of things which you are believe that he feared from.find out actually the causes of it. keep a note of things which keep her calm.There are various ways for curing anxiety. Proper medical Treatment is best way to cure this problem. Another is yoga , meditation, exercise, positive thinking. Physiological therapy is important factor in treatment of anxiety.
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replied May 10th, 2011
I have a similar problem with my 9 year old boy. I'm beginning to realise that it is my own baggage and worries that are affecting him. Last week, he told his teacher that he'd been horrible to me on my birthday and that was why he was upset in class. This weekend, he had a swimming race disqualification that really upset him. I was upset for him too, but I have to try to lead by example. So my crying for him doesn't help. I need to be strong, philosophical and lead him through it. Children pick up on our worries and anxieties very easily, even if we try to hide them. Happy, stable parents are key.
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replied May 10th, 2011
Experienced User
My son is nearly 9,and he is very nervous kid. He is always screaming at everyone, arguing with all of us, doesn't want to write his homework,he is such a good pupil,everything is ok at the school,but at home he doesn't want to be like that. I tried to speak with his teacher,she said he is the best in the class, so what is happening with him,i really can't understand. I tried to spaek with him, it doesn't worked. He doesn't want to cooperate.He refuses every word i say,he's fighting me and his sister and father. Someone knows how to help me?
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replied September 7th, 2011
Child Anxiety
My son started out being diagnosed as ADHD with anxiety in 2nd grade. By 4th grade he went into full shutdown and would not go to school. He ended up staying 5 days at a facility for treatment and they diagnosed him as Severe Anxiety with ADHD. We have been on meds that made him gain 50 lbs in 3 months and switched then to meds that made him lose all of it in the next 3 months. We have now been on same meds for 2 years and started 6th grade/middle school and full blown anxiety again. We are checking out a new therapist this week and he has an appointment with his doctor the end of the month to see about revising his meds. I am tired of dealing with so many people of authority that are so ignorant to all of this and they work with our children every day. I had to withdraw my son from school last week to home school him just so our wonderful county law enforcement wouldn't arrest my son for truancy because he has missed 3 days due to his anxiety. This guy with the badge threatened me that he was going to arrest him or call child protective services is I hadn't withdrawn him to home school him. Like I don't have enough to deal with seeing my son go through something I can't stop or protect him from. I know this hasn't been of much help probably because I am letting everyone know that this is a constant job. Please find a good pediatrician (mine said he would pay 1/2 for a lawyer to go after these people if I wanted him to LOL) and communicate everything so they can help your child. We had a good therapist who ended up with medical issues then retired so we are now looking again and, trust me, child therapist are not abundent in my area so finding a good one that my son will relate to is not an easy matter. I wish all of us the best of luck for our children's sake.
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replied August 7th, 2012
10 Year old with severe anxiety disorder and separation anxiety.
Hi There I too have a child diagnosed with Generalised Anxiety Disorder and Severe Separation anxiety. I have had so much trouble with missing school and just trying to help him especially as he has had very severe panic attacks. I have decided not to medicate and to try every thing first, including sit in the school carpark...I am on my 6th week, i sit in the school carpark from 7.30 am till 3pm allllll day.....He in turn has not had a panic attack and is perfectly happy and if not back to normal with the knowledge i am in the carpark... It has been 6 weeks, i have accepted it and allowed a deadline of another 3 months. after that i will have to try something else....I am using cognative behavioural therapy and leaving from 8am till 9.30....small steps but because he isnt in a panicked state it seems to be ok...small steps and very slow paced.....I have met a woman who said 'they have no trust...u need to build it back up and do whatever it takes" another that suggested that for as long as it took to feel the anxiety come on, is as long as it will take to heal......i obviously cannot believe my life has come to this and the sacrifices on the other family members is immense but I am determined to see if this method works......regards angie
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Users who thank ovenden5 for this post: pammate 

replied August 17th, 2012
Angie...God love you...I to have sat in the school parking lot and also the hallway and outside her classroom. This is such a debilating disease. I feel so bad for these kids they cant help it. Ended up having to home school her but am going to try public school again this year. She is now not eating anything solid liquids only. I have an appointment for a medication evaluation. This has been awful. I feel for you and your child. Best of luck. Let me know if you find the miracle cure...Marci
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replied August 17th, 2012
childs anxiety...school
Angie...God love you...I to have sat in the school parking lot and also the hallway and outside her classroom. This is such a debilating disease. I feel so bad for these kids they cant help it. Ended up having to home school her but am going to try public school again this year. She is now not eating anything solid liquids only. I have an appointment for a medication evaluation. This has been awful. I feel for you and your child. Best of luck. Let me know if you find the miracle cure...Marci
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replied June 10th, 2012
Anxiety 9 year old
My son is 9 and he is overly sensitive. He is so worried about hurting someones feelings and he crys on a drop of a dime. And when you try talking to him he starts to cry and all he says is that he can't control it. I dont really know what to do to help him, and understand what might be causing him to act this way. Can anyonw help me.
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