I'm not educated in the subject and can therefore not give you professional advice, but I can speak from my heart.
I know exactly how you feel when you say you feel sick by just being around food. Same here. And, it seems as though we both know that we have to stop this thing and start eating again.
The way things got sorted out for me last time was that I started climbing. Climbing is a sport where you really need your strength, but it won't burn very much fat. It's also a very social sport where you meet a lot of great people; people who accept you for who you are. Climbing is fun, it's a little bit scary but the adrenaline is wonderful. And if one finds it fun, one continues and therefore the body needs more food. I completely forgot about my fear for food after two weeks' climbing. I gained from 94 lbs to 110 lbs in two months and were then considered healthy (on the verge to underweight, of course, but still healthy).
Though now, I'm back again. I just asked a dear friend of mine to literally drag me to the climbing hall to get me back in business.
And that's what I think you should try. Try a sport which is active, but not burning too much fat. Forget about power-walk/jogging/running or the gym. If you're not dead scared of heights, I dearly recommend climbing. It gave me a new life. Otherwise you can try things like martial arts, dancing (not ballet!) or gymnastics, since they keep you on the ground but you're using mostly the same muscles. Though I must say that climbers are the kindest group of people on the planet.
It's terrible to hear about your loss. It's very strong of you to be able to talk about it. Your friend and sister must be proud of you.
Please let me know if you need someone to talk to.
Love,
E
