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Angry with suicidal thoughts

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i just started this so i'm not 100% sure how to do this.. well my friends have told me that i have changed a lot since last school year. i have so many mood swings. i have cryed and yell at my friends for no reason! i have no idea why i'm doing this. when i feel as if i hurt one of my friends or family members i get mad then lock myself in my room and cry. after i usually cut deep gashes in my left arm and sometimes my legs. i try to hide these things from my parents because i know that the last thing they want to deal with is me. they discovered a couple of my cuts but i lie and say that i "Fell".. my best friend is getting tired of my mood swings and does not like me hurting myself, she is encouraging me to seek medical help.. i know my mom does not care about my problems, so i keep my feelings hidden. i have some money saved up of my own, and i was wondering if theres any type of pills, or shots i could get with out my mom. i have thought many times of just ending everything. this world wont miss me, my parents don't care. i have came close to actually killing myself multiple times.. but i never manage it.. i really need help.. Crying or Very sad
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replied February 10th, 2010
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oh sweet thing, i feel sorry for you dear a lovely young girl like a beautiful flower. your like a lovely flower your friends and families life will be like an empty garden without you . .. sweeti i know your going through a lot pain its hard for people to know or understand what your going through unless they are in your shoe the best thing to do is to visit a therapist you would feel a lot better. more than you can imagine only a specialist can know whats wrong and how to fix it its easier than you think why suffer sweet thing get help. its important to ell ur mom no one in earth would love and care as much as she does no matter how harsh she is with you. there is alot going on inside you and hurting ur self make it wores once you seek help your life will transfor to heaven ...and youll be joyfull but it needs time ....and ... action
all my best wishes
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replied April 16th, 2010
hi , somehow going through same as you are. i once tried to kill myself but well it wasn't as easy as i thought it would be.i yell at my mother too but well thats her fault not mine she is just plain grrr...so under my skin. also i am so angry sometimes that i hit myself till i get bruises.well i dunno bout you but there will come a time that i would get so exhausted being angry, crying, and thinking so much things in my head.that i just stop caring about all this bad stuffs thats going on, you should love yourself don't allow other people to put you down no matter who they are plus..yelling to people is useless believe me they aren't listening no matter how you yelled more loudly! would frustrate you more...oh and keep a very close friend whom you trust and u felt won't judge you could tell some of your problems to, it would quite good for you Smile
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