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angry, upset with mother

Hi Im 22 years old, living with my mum, step dad, sister of 15, sister of 11 and my lil cousin stays with us too as my mums brother is in jail, my mum has taken care of him for last 2 years he is 6 years old.. I want to explain as much as possible so you can get a understanding of where am at.. from age of 20 or so i have really noticed how my mum has brought up kids. especially the last year as i have calmed my self down with going out drinking every weekend, being a complete immature, selfish person. The way i see that my mum is bringing up my lil cousin and lil sisters is learn for yourself, teach yourself faults in life. there is no discipline what so ever, they can eat what they want and when they want, speak how they want, the words that come out of lil cousin is shocking nothing gets done about it, just a dont say that, other day he lit a fire and the police and fire brigade was involved, he got told he wasnt allowed out but got out later when i wasnt around, as i wasnt allowing him to go out, for about two hours when i was in the house he was screaming to get out and my mum was saying no but i heard her saying wait until he goes out (meaning me) so he calmed down. i was ranging but didnt say a thing and went out but didnt go far so i could see if he came out which he did. makes me have no respect for my mum. Im just trying to give u understanding of how things are dealt with in our house. my mum will say no to something but then give in when the kids go in a rage, cry and moan for it. she doesnt give them the knowledge of whats rite and whats wrong. through my years at school i didnt care about any1, nor listen to any1, didnt stick in at school, came away with silly grades and was a nasty person. i just think its the way i have been brought up by her. i can see my lil sisters being the same well my eldest sister has been skipping college doing pretty much what i was doing, maybe exspect taking drugs, as what i know just now. my youngest sister is nothing but lazy, shes on her laptop about 6 hours a day on school nites. just no discipline at all.. me and my sisters all have diff dads. my youngest sisters dad lives with us, the step dad. Im just confused and angry with the way i have been brought up and the way im seeing my mum do it. i know there is not a perfect way of bringing kids up but there is a better way than what av been through. iv noticed i have been taking the anger out on my younger sisters and my cousin but tried hard not too. its my mum that is causing problems with my our relationshipsi try and teach my lil sisters and cousin discipline and how to do things a sensible way but get know where, especially with my cousin as he moans for my mum n he knows that my mum will say something to me and he will get off with it. i end up arguing with my mum but find it really hard to express my feelings to her when i am angry, when av calmed down i think of trhings i need to say, i try and have a adult conversation with her but get know where with it, says nice things just to shut me up as she does none of the things she says she will do. I have been in tears with thinking about the way things are. im so happy i have the girlfriend i have. been together for over 6 years, the way i have treated her in the past is unreal and its all been because of my mental state, wanting this and that not happy about stupid lil things, wanting everything my way.. My question is, is it actually worth talking to my mum? i dont think it is as her personality is so ignorant and nothing will change... or should i just leave things behind, get my own place and just look after my lil sisters and cousin?? im sorry if this letter is al over the place, i find it really hard to explain my self, i know it all in my head but hard to get out. any advice and tips is much appreciated. please no nasty comments.
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