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angry and depressed.

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alright guys, not sure how to put this this is my first post.
im 18, iv always had a bit of a funny temper, but never felt i could talk or do anything about it..i feel frustrated and unsaticfied all the time, to hitting rock bottom and feeling so depressed and then within minuits switch and get these rages, my hole body shakes and i feel like im thinking of so many things i dont even know what im thinking about, the only way i can explain it is that i feel like im going to explode. i lash out and hit and swing at anything in my way.. im tearing my family apart, and watching my self ruin my life but theres nothing i can do. i just want 1 day where i feel ok! just one day. iv ruined everything iv had going for me, im mentally and physically nakered of being andgry and down.. the moods are so close together i dont know who i am anymore. i feel so alone, but at the same time i dont want to be around anyone cause its got to the point where i really dont know what im doing anymore.. iv got knowone left, i hate my self for what iv done. the only person i had left and could trust wont have anything more to do with me as one of my rages was aimed towards him and feel sick about some of the stuff i said.
iv been to the doctors and am on antidepressents and support but nothings working.
i dont know what i expect from writing this, im not looking for simpithy i just needed a way of getting it out.. just doesent seem like theres anymore options left.
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First Helper friend111
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replied October 4th, 2010
For depression specifically, exercise is extremely useful. Just 10-15 minutes of intense exercise will lift you out your mood very effectively. The trouble is of course when you're depressed you feel you don't have the energy for it; but if you force yourself to do, it rarely fails. And once you've seen it work a few times, it's much easier to force yourself to do it because you know it will help.
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replied October 8th, 2010
cheers for ya reply, i do as much exersice as i can.. but your right i do find it helps. 5 days a week im down the gym concentrating on my powerlifting, i get home and go boxing.. i find it gets alot worse at weekends when im forced to rest, but nothing lifts me out of these moods, i go on a high when im doing it but give it an hour and i drop again. im sooo sick of it, its got to the point were i hate being along but when im around people i really dont even know what to do, or act. it takes the tineyest things to set me of, that no one wants to be around me.. i dont blame them. i was sitting in the doctors the other day and there was a little boy counting behind me, i was fuming that he could obviously count but was doing it anyway, i prob thought somewhere in my head that he was doing it to annoy me but i sat there shaking trying to calm my self down, but at the same time theres the the other part of me shouting at myself what are you doing! i was so angry and ashamed with my self for thinking what i was, he was only a happy little kid..im just sick of it.
sorry for the rant.
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replied October 10th, 2010
irritated and angry within seconds-only to close ppl
hi i'm 25 years old, i used always be calm and not really have much of a temper. for the past 2 years i become really angry and irritated by the littlest thngs and tent to speak/treat close ppl lyk crap but at the time feel iv done nothing wrong...it all started when i let my so called best mate run my lyf wer i kept it inside me for years and its made me so bitter. i now taken it out on my boyfriend. anything he sais irritates and i had it when ppl ask to much questions. its come to the point wer if he was to be wearing the same clothes it makes me sick??? pls help
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replied October 15th, 2010
glad to see im not the only person going through it, have you gone to the doctors or got any help?..may help ya, didnt in my case but everyones different i spose. iv got to the point where i cant really ruin anything else going for me so i guess the only way is up if ya thinking positive. hope ya sort ya head out.
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replied October 19th, 2010
thanks for that...dnt fnk da docs well help coz i always get mixed feeling so if he was to a
ask me various questions il be 'hmmm may, sometimes umm not sure!!! lol i just try staying calm. thank u 4 ur reply.have u had ne progress??
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replied October 31st, 2010
no not really, get the od day better than the rest..something you have to live with though so might aswell get on with it.. i just more fed up more than anything.
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replied March 5th, 2011
anxiety & angry
am glad i found this post i have started feeling like am about to explode any minute am so sick and tired of feeling so bad but today has been the worse ever i woke up feeling great then the next minute i was doing some ironing and felt like i was about to throw the iron at some1 (but i never) am just so sick of feeling anxious 24/7 and feel dead angry and fustrated with myself that why am i suffering like this i should be better by now i have suffered with anxiety to long and am so so depressed but why am i feeling angry ??
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replied August 31st, 2011
friends
you are all on the way to recovery, all of you have taken the first step which is acknowleding yourself, understanding yourself, even if you feel out of control, youre saying, this is whats happening, and i want to change. i tell you truly, because you want to be cured, you can be.

i am not a professional, just an ordinary man. i do not have anything special gift to give, just this simple advice. i too used to have problems with anger. i destroyed many things, although i had a sense of shame so i didnt really take it out on people too much. in any case, the solution is the same. you have to realise you'll only get out what you put in. we cant mix evil with the truth. i dont think we need to be christian to understand the wisdom of- 'a man cannot serve two masters'.

in native american wisdom, we would say that we are each a part of the web of life. and that what we do to the web, we do to ourselves. dont worry too much about what others are doing or how they treat you. it is better to master yourself than master others. when you can realise the wisdom of how to live, and be happy, when you choose for yourself, just through your intention, it will, through practice, become you.

You have to simply say within yourself- come what may, im going to better myself. not for no reason, not even because anger doesnt feel good after so long, but simply because i understand the life, that i'll only get out what i put in. My people, city life makes our hearts hard. dont be afraid to cry, as the ancient people said it will take the sorrow away from your heart. i say, stop being concerned about small things and be concerned only with your own sincerity. take steps, little by little, to master yourself and become self sufficient. dont lean on people too much...can you do that? its not easy, but neither is being controlled by your emotions. be led by understanding!

Garry A / laohulong
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replied August 31st, 2011
realise the beauty of moderation. live a simple, relatively peaceful way of life. then you can find the depth of the ordinary and be happy now, happy with all that you have, and work on your dreams. only the best wishes to each of you


Garry
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