I just started dating this really nice guy and so far things are going really well. He comes off very sweet and I am attracted but I can feel myself trying ot pick out something wrong with him and its frustrating. The weird tihng is that I do this with every guy I get interested in. Its gotten worse in the last couple of years but I notice that I always try to pick out something I don't like or want to change about a guy and agonize over it and whether or not other people see the flaw too and judge me based on my type. I know it sounds sorta frazzled and overly self critical but I am unsure of how to change it.
When it comes to my boyfriend, he used to be very skinny and athletic but he gained some extra weight after his previous break up and hes trying to lose it but I can feel myself making that the issue I am focusing on and I don't want it ot be. He's, apart from the small weight issue, everything I could honestly ask for in a guy and if I am patient I am sure the weight wouldn't even be an issue anymore but I just don't know how to turn that rediculous part of my brain off. Is this a problem anyone else has had? What should I do to make it less of an issue?
do you nag him, nit pick, make him feel bad about it? do you bring it up all the time?
has this caused problems in your previous relationships? if so i would consider seeing a therapist.
everyone has flaws!