Hi this is my first time EVER posting on any kind of anything asking a question like this, I've never been so distraught..
Ok so this is a kind of long story but I can't stop thinking, so bear with me please . My boyfriend and I were together 2 years, I had some health problems and was put on a medication that made me pretty much lose my mind. I broke the window in our living room, tried to stab him with a pen, he called the cops, I went to jail. I got out the same day, he wouldn't talk to me of course, his mom told me to just stop trying and give it time. So I got off the meds, he took me back about a week after the whole thing and everything was good I went to court ordered anger management classes and all that. So that was AUGUST 2011, its been awhile and we've had our arguments and whatever, the normal stuff. But for about the last month now we've been arguing a lot, but nothing I wasnt willing to work with or accept or whatever I was happy with him still, he said my attitude was hateful and to me I never felt that. So April 23rd I was laying in our bed watching tv and he was out for a job interview when I get a text from him saying he's at the point where he needs to be by himself,he's just not happy and we'll always be best friends that's why he's willing to help pay for a plane ticket if I want to go to my Moms in Oregon. So I call him repeatedly and he won't answer, I'm texting him please talk to me, we can work on this, I had no idea, all that stuff but no he said nothing is going to change his mind he is done he's very sorry, just get what I need out of the house for me and the dog and he'll pack everything up. I was completely devastated, I didn't know what was happening, he always told me I completed him, I'm his world, we're together for the long run I'm gonna be his wife and all of that. I heard those things every day. Even if we fought. So anyway, he called my brother from where ever he was to come pick me up without me even knowing & that night he packed every single thing of mine and the dogs, down to the box of band aids I bought a couple weeks before. Even food I bought.. he called my brother to come pick it up because they've been friends since before we even got together. So I was completely lost, blindsided, confused, hurt and just not understanding everything so I called him like crazy, texted him a million times begging to talk to me that I know we can work this out and he just kept telling me to leave him alone he's gonna block my number or change his and its just not gonna work, he loves me but he can't help if he wasn't happy. I called and text for days and he didn't want anything to do with it. I completely regret doing all that but my mind was crazy. On the 6th day I didn't contact him at all and on the 7th he contacted me being hurtful saying he knows I'm seeing someone else already, that I blocked and deleted him from everything, he wishes the new guy luck and have a good life and all kinds of extremely hurtful things that are just not true. Of course I responded assuring him I'm not doing anything at all that he's the one who blocked and deleted me from anything, he's the one that won't talk to me. He went back to saying leave him alone. Well later that night, this was last night 4/30, I text him pouring my heart out saying how much I missed him, reminding him of our good times, I'll always love him and I'm gonna make myself right so we can be right I have faith its going to work out. So he said he cried when he read it and he loves me so much but it just didn't work out. So we go along talking about us, what I can do differently and I hope he at least considers things, I told him goodnight and that I love him. He said I love you too goodnight. And that was it.. Im trying not to contact him anymore but its killing me I havent heard from him all day but I just have this gut feeling that its gonna work out and we're gonna get back together and I just need some advice on how to approach things.
Soo my question would be. Well I have 2, what do you think this means that he said I love you too goodnight And left it at that and do you think I'm crazy for being so hopeful he will come back to me? Any insight is appreciated! Oh, by the way, I'm 23 and he is 21. We've been thru 2 break ups before, the one I mentioned and 1 when we first started dating I decided I wasn't ready for a relationship but realized he was my one and got him back. We've also been thru the loss of twins thru miscarriage, we were both extremely devastated because we both decided to start our lives together and were happy/excited to be pregnant. So we've been thru a lot, we're both close with each others families also and his mom is telling me to give it time again but I'm still so scared he might be done.. Thanks again for reading my novel lol sorry its so long!