I think you should tell someone about this like a school couselor. Or maybe another close trusted family member like an aunt or uncle. What does your mother do or say?

And yes I would call this abuse.

hello there so sorry to hear you are going through this and i would advice you speak to someone soon.
no one deserves to be treated the way you are and its no wonder you are confused. there must be someone to talk too as this could get out of hand sweetheart.
where is your mum??? is your dad bringing you up single handed.? when i was your age there is no doubt at one time or other really annoyed my parents but never did they hit and punch me like you are experiencing.
please keep in touch and let us know you are okay.

no my mom lives with us idk about her she sees me getting hit and yelled at but doesnt say anything she BARLEY abuses me mentally and physically sehs more of the *i play favorites type mom* shes a real b*tch. BUt i do love her she lovves me and shes okay

Then you mother is just as guilty as your father. Seriously, tell someone outside your family that you trust.



Well, there is no barely to it...if she is being abusive towards you on any level then it is abuse...that simple.



Are you kidding? You are accepting this sort of behavior so if your boyfriend or husband treats you the way that you parents do...hate to say it but you'll accept it as normal and it's NOT.

its been a while since i responded cuz i kinda gave up on it....but i stil am confused on what level or degree on how bad it is....its not that he has broken a bone but he does hit throw things and punches even jokingliy and seriously but then...the next day hes super nice he doesnt feele guilty so he isnt that hit feel guilty hit blah blah and it makes me wonder if it affects other things .. like hard to make or keep friends, i can be mean and i dont even know it....i get angry easly plus im not a loving person at all i mean my personality is anger and it changes to

You are a victim of child abuse and I can tell you that if you don't tell someone you will end up with some scars and I'm not talking about the physical scars. Your mom is just as guilty as your dad for not stopping the abuse from your father. When I was a child and young teen my father would tease me and then when I tried to defend myself he would beat me. No, he never broke a bone but he broke me and it took me many years of psychological help to understand that it wasn't my fault. He would do like your dad and buy me things out of guilt. It made him feel better and according to my mother, he didn't even remember hitting me. I'm 44, much older than you, and just now putting myself back together. I love my parents and I have realized that it was a mixture of his own illness and ignorance that caused him to abuse me. In other words, I have learned to forgive, but we never forget. I was left with an illness they call Borderline Personality Disorder and only with meds have I been able to control my emotions and temper. Please don't dismiss this and take it lightly. Please tell someone, a teacher, a counselor, a friend's mother. Tell someone you know will help you. The best thing would be for you and your parents to go to counseling together. Most parents won't do this because they don't want the finger pointed at them. It's really tough but you can't let it continue. I know what you're going through so if you need to talk or have any questions I'm here. You can even PM me if you want to talk privately. Also, my mother was the same way, very cold and did nothing to stop what was going on.

Okay, I just had to catch up on things. Why did you give up on your post? This is a place you can vent and at least get some helpful advice. With that said....You can be mean? You are not a loving person? Sweetie look at what you are living in. Abuse whether verbal or physical can change the soul. I have no doubt your parents love you. I do however doubt their judgment as parents. Is your father bi-polar? Any psychological disorders? You love your parents and crazy as it is children abused seem to cling to their parents. It's almost like they don't know any better? Sound familiar? Right now you are not in a healthy environment. Period! Do you have grandparents around? Someone you can talk to?

YouAreSoGreat-Honey you need to tell someone like a policeman..No one deserves to be hit..You have done no wrong-please understand that..ou get him mad--I think a piece of paper could get huim mad..I grew up with a mother who demanded I find a switch at her beck and call--I didn't have to do any harm..She would throw my things off my dresser and my sisters then after doing her thing she would demand we have place cleaned up in an exaggerated time..She would switch us kids until we bleed just not in areas that showed..

We all want to believe our familes love us and care..Your dad has threatened your life..I say put his butt in jail and get out of dodge while you can..You ned someplace calm to grow up in where you are cared for not abused..kd

OMG A POLICE!!!!?? i cannot do that omg no way i honestly dont feel like im the worst case. but there isnt any phycological things in the family but my dad has a short temper for sure. i dont even think he realizes that he does it i really dnt want to start anything big. i really think im jsut one day gonna tell a friend and live with it i dont kno or think taht it affects me or not cuz im not sure if it actully does... i know i cant tell a proffesoinal b.c i wud nevr hav the guts to say anything much..

My father just had a short temper too and trust me it does do psychological damage. It's your choice and we've given you some good advice.

yes u did!!!

Your dad is an abuser plain and simple..Your words-he will hit and then next day say he's sorry..Big deal_i'm sorry honey I won't do it again until I feel like it.Give me a break and yourself..

You need to open your eyes--if you have friends whose families act like yours-DON'T make them your model..Talk with people, talk withe hte fire department, police department-tell them you just want to talk and ask them these questions:
1.What is verbal abuse

2.What is physical abuse

3.Do people who do verbal and physical abuse end up hurting someone for life? What if it is a fmily member like a mom or dad?

4.Does someone who says I'm going to kill you someday-actually follow through

5.(If) you knew someone in this kind of relationship what do they recommend you tell your friend?

6.What would happen to your friend and the fmaily if police intervened?

You say there isn't any psychological things going on but your dad has a short temper--this is a psyche problem..

You honey are not starting anything--your dad started your trouble-not you..

(I have a question for you--I have a daughter and you and she are best freinds..She is being smacked around by her dad and mom doesn't step up to help her-what do you think she should do? You have seen ugly brusies on her back and abdomen and she has said she fell down..But you have seen that anger in her dads eyes..You know, but what can you do to help her)?
One day you go to visit her but you are told not to come by anymore-the reason you learn later is because she was severely beaten b a dad who almost completed a promise....You learn your friend was beat up and taken to the ER she may not make it..How does this make you feel..

I have a feeling my little story is very close to your life..You see an abuser does not want people around or else they will be found out..An abuser likes to be in control and threaten others..An abuser knows if very many people come into the family home that someone will learn everything and the abuser loses control of the situation..You see no way will I allow someone to smack around onanyone and I have no problem getting into the face of an abuser..Why, because when I was a child I was abused and it will not happen again..

You know I am telling you the truth don't you..kd

If you do not seek some kind of guidance and healing you will be become a creature of habit.

but i dont get beaten enough to go to the er...but is there a hotline for this thing...

Honey-how much is enough re getting beaten..To me one time is more than enough..

Maybe you haven't had to go to the ER -yet--what happens if it ever happened..Have you been hurt and told to say you fell..Do you have brusies? You can tell me or anyone else whatever you want and I will still be here..
The one person who knows all is yourself-because you know the truth and when you are tired of being hurt you will talk to the right people for help..Don't look at talking to a policeman as getting your dad or mom into trouble..Sometimes it takes a hard call like that to get help for self and for the person doing the hurting..

When our parent or parents hurt us we don't want to believe it even when it happens..We cry and say dumb things like what did I do wrong..We don't want even still to think our parents can do worng..BUT, they can and do..They ae human and when the hurt someone the right people need to know..




Look at this site: it has a 1.800 number..
http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/ovc/help/ca.htm

If ever in pain you don't have to do anything more than dial 911 and ask to speak to a police man or fireman..These people are trianed to talk with you and help you..

Verbal abuse is far worse than physical abuse. Physical pain heals, verbal pain cuts the soul, diminishes you from the inside of self worth. However, both can play hand and hand and when one presents itself waiting around for the other to get just as bad is like putting fuel on a fire. Some games in life are not worth it. Do you really want to gamble with those odds?

see thats the thing....i dont have any bruises.......

Are you comprehending what has been written? You do not have any bruises but plenty of emotional damage. You are asking for advice and you are being responded to. However, I do not feel you are ready for help yet. Just a mere speculation on my part.

You asked for a phone number so here is one for you to call to get help.

They are there 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Please call the number below and talk with them. Tell them what you have told us and maybe they can help you to understand what is going on in your family and with your father.

Maybe they can give you some advise on what to do, how you should handle things and explain to you what emotional abuse is and what physical abuse is.

Good luck

Please call the number below

Fran

National Domestic Violence Hotline or call 800-779-7233
This site offers 24/7 support, including referrals to free local counseling for teens and young adults. It opens 365 days and to Puerto Rico, and US Virgin Island.