So. I'm an almost-fourteen-year-old girl (it is a matter of days at this point). For the first twelve or so years of my life, I was attracted exclusively to boys... and it never worked out. They literally ran away from me. Gradually as I grew older, I had a vague idea of growing up and turning out to be a lesbian, like how some people grow up and turn out to be really tall. During my thirteenth year, I began to feel increasing attractions to girls. Finally, for basically the entire month of May, I had this very physical lust for "Vicki", a straight, popular girl who dressed like a lady of the evening. Only a couple people ever found out. She is a classmate I will probably never see again now that I've graduated junior high. A little while after this blew over, I came to terms with the fact I wasn't straight. (Lesbianism or bisexuality... does it even matter? Practically the same social stigma is associated with both. Still working it out.)

Then in the summer I saw my friend "Stella" again. You can probably tell right now where this is going. I know Stella through a camp we have both attended since we were ten. (We never manage to see each other outside of it. More on this later.) She is quite possibly my single best friend in the entire world. When I saw her again, though, it began to be in a completely different light. I realized things like how incredibly hot her blue highlights were, and the subtly immodest clothing she wore. Before long, the following conversation took place at lunch:

Me: Blah blah blah anime
Stella: Blah blah blah manga
Me: Blah blah blah television
Stella: Blah blah blah DS games
Me: I think I'm in love with you.
Stella: ...blah blah blah DS games
Me: Blah blah blah anime
Stella: Blah blah blah manga
Me: So your plan is just to completely ignore this whole "me being in love with you" thing?
Stella: (with a slight laugh) I'm sorry! I just don't know what to say!

She went on to tell me that she had had a crush much like mine on Vicki. We bonded, and went on to blahblahblah about our lunch foods.

Now that the camp is over, we've been bonding over the Internet. Really, in many ways it resembles a long-distance relationship. Basically the only major difference between us is that I love her passionately and she just wants to be friends. Like, what do I do? Do I just wait for her to realize that we're made for each other? Do I get over this girl already and go back to unfulfilling, unrequited relationships with boys?