ADHD or bipolar symptoms ?

Hi..... This one might be complicated, but I'd really appreciate any answers.

Gonna get to the point:
I have ADHD. It and Bipolar disorder both run in my family. My grandmother had it for sure....

I have been on ADHD medications since childhood. I took 20 mg of adderall between ages 12-13. At 14 I was placed on 10 mg, and then started taking 5 mg when I was turning 17. I don't take ADHD pills over summer break.

Since I was about 16, I've started to experience about 3 moods in a day. Sometimes they will happen for no reason, other times they're sort set off, either by something that just happened or I kind of 'thought' myself into it (Got myself depressed or happy).

I feel normal most of the day. Then, I'll feel pretty depressed. I'll feel like a failure, empty, it seems like life will never be too good, and like I'm not worth too much. I'll often cry a little. It's not soul-crushing, death-lusting sadness like major depression, though...

When I'm happy, I'm bouncing off the walls, feeling euphoric, my thoughts race at 100 miles and hour, I tend to have giggle fits if something I think of is humorous to me, I can either hyperfocus but usually can't kepp mentally on track for anything at all, and I might be just crazy and noisy with friends (and embarrass myself). Sometimes I can't stop laughing in class over something that just happened or what I was thinking about... Even if it's gotten old to everyone else or wasn't that funny.


For the last 7 months I've been depressed..... But now I'm starting to feel normal again..... I'm embarrassed about what made me so sad, but anyway it was triggered off.... At first the amount of sadness for the situation was probably normal..... You know, my mood was just very low.... Then things (by external and internal faults) happened and I spiraled down into major depression (I'm positive that's what was wrong with me). Soon I'm feeling loads of things that aren't true (such as guilt and worthlessness, for examples), and feeling that whole dark-pit-with-no-light thing, crying several times a day, wishing for death and sometimes thinking of suicide, you get it.

Then, it started slowly going away, but other things happened that have kept me pretty far down in near constant depression until now. I'm finally starting to feel alive and hopeful("everything will be okay") again....


Even when not taking adderall, whether for a day or over the whole summer I still have weird moods... Could it all be from taking adderall so long? Btw, I have never abused my medication.

Does anyone have any idea what could be going on?


Well, anyway. Thank you!