Hi..... This one might be complicated, but I'd really appreciate any answers.
Gonna get to the point:
I have ADHD. It and Bipolar disorder both run in my family. My grandmother had it for sure....
I have been on ADHD medications since childhood. I took 20 mg of adderall between ages 12-13. At 14 I was placed on 10 mg, and then started taking 5 mg when I was turning 17. I don't take ADHD pills over summer break.
Since I was about 16, I've started to experience about 3 moods in a day. Sometimes they will happen for no reason, other times they're sort set off, either by something that just happened or I kind of 'thought' myself into it (Got myself depressed or happy).
I feel normal most of the day. Then, I'll feel pretty depressed. I'll feel like a failure, empty, it seems like life will never be too good, and like I'm not worth too much. I'll often cry a little. It's not soul-crushing, death-lusting sadness like major depression, though...
When I'm happy, I'm bouncing off the walls, feeling euphoric, my thoughts race at 100 miles and hour, I tend to have giggle fits if something I think of is humorous to me, I can either hyperfocus but usually can't kepp mentally on track for anything at all, and I might be just crazy and noisy with friends (and embarrass myself). Sometimes I can't stop laughing in class over something that just happened or what I was thinking about... Even if it's gotten old to everyone else or wasn't that funny.
For the last 7 months I've been depressed..... But now I'm starting to feel normal again..... I'm embarrassed about what made me so sad, but anyway it was triggered off.... At first the amount of sadness for the situation was probably normal..... You know, my mood was just very low.... Then things (by external and internal faults) happened and I spiraled down into major depression (I'm positive that's what was wrong with me). Soon I'm feeling loads of things that aren't true (such as guilt and worthlessness, for examples), and feeling that whole dark-pit-with-no-light thing, crying several times a day, wishing for death and sometimes thinking of suicide, you get it.
Then, it started slowly going away, but other things happened that have kept me pretty far down in near constant depression until now. I'm finally starting to feel alive and hopeful("everything will be okay") again....
Even when not taking adderall, whether for a day or over the whole summer I still have weird moods... Could it all be from taking adderall so long? Btw, I have never abused my medication.
Sometimes I wonder the same thing about myself. I have been diagnost with depression last year (I'm 23). I went through some things in life, I lost my best friend and that impacted me pretty bad, so I started seeing world in a different view. I finally snapped out of it when I had a long talk with a family memeber. It really helps when you talk to someone. But than I started having crazy mood swings few years later. And I still have them today even though I am taking an antidepressant. I don't like to be drug depended by I have no other choice. Zoloft does help me in my mood swings (even though they appears sometimes), but I keep having racing thoughts, I try to organize things, but I mess them all up quickly. Sometimes I don't know what I want. One second I want one thing, and the next minute I completely want something else. It is weird and freaking me out sometimes. I have a feeling like I'm going crazy or something. I think what we have is a chemical imbalance in our brain. I have done some research. Try speaking to your doctor or change a doctor since not every is the same. Go online and try researching it as much as you can. Rent books from the libraries. It is more interesting also getting the information on your own because it gives you the feeling you're actually doing something for yourself. Thanks for reading and good luck! I don't know if I helped or not but I just wanted to give my opinion about some things!
Oh fuhhhhhhh........ Are you serious? I thought swings were supposed to last a good while? Medication can cause them to be a few hours a day? Jesus.
Well, thank you anyway.
Yes, my mom and I are planning on going to our family doctor about my depression.... Which feels nearly over, I've been pretty normal mooded for the last week (still get some down moments). But we're still going anyway. :/