HI

I have been where you are. I was 16 when I started bulemia, and I continued till I was 32. You don't want to be doing this all your young adult life. It will really mess with you and the more you do it, the more it seems normal, and the harder it will be to get out of it.

Get help if you can, go to your local doctor and talk to them and they may be able to point you in the right direction. If you don't feel you can do that then there are other things you can do

It seems to me that bulemia is mostly about control. You finally feel like you are in control of your diet, that you can eat what you like and it won't affect your weight, at least that was what it was for me. In actual fact the opposite is true, the longer you are bulemic, the more you mess up your metabolism and the more weight you put on when you do digest something.

I know exactly what you mean when you say you think about food all the time and it actually affects your life. It was like that for me too. I was a fat child and teenager and desperately wanted to be thin. i did that but at such a terrible cost! In looking back I would have been so much better to go on a sensible diet and exercise and I would have lost the weight slowly yes, but safely and I wouldn't have ruined my health too.

Do your parents know about this? The first step to fighting an addiction (and you have a food addiction) is to acknowledge it and admit it to those that are in a position to help. Maybe you can talk to your folks about getting you onto a healthy eating plan at home, and doing some exercise. By the way I found exercise the best thing, as this actually releases endorphines into your brain making you feel better and impoving your mood. If you do it regularly you will actually start to see great results within your body and not feel like you need to binge.

Anyway, read as much as you can about it and understand that you are not alone. There are so many people with this disease and all struggle with it. The media doesn't help with such unhealthy models and actresses everywhere.

Best of luck and I will would love to hear updates from you from time to time if you can

I am in the same position, apart from I am 20 and have failed my first year of university. I managed to make it to the University of Manchester, unbelievably enough, but a couple of weeks ago, everything hit me, and i was thinking what on earth am i going to do now i have failed. I had to tell my personal tutor that i was failing and that i had an "eating problem" as i put it.. but after overdosing on laxatives after a ridiculous arguement with my boyfriend and his ex, i ended up in hospital because i had a fainting seisure. I realised it has got to a point where i needed to go somewhere, because my whole life and future, is falling to pieces. It wasnt as daunting as it seemed, and is completely confidential. To be honest all he did was send me away with a questionairre and told me to come back with it in two weeks. But it is honestly ok going to the doctors, i was so scared of them telling my family etc, but they cant. Please please please do it and get things sorted before your GCSE's, do not let it ruin things for you in your future, it will be so much worse if you don't do things now.

Thank you so much!,
Following your advice ive managed to cut down my food intake by heaps. today my binge only consisted of a whole ice-cream cake, a 12 pk of doughnuts and a 1.25L coke I am so proud of myself. I have been afraid tok try to take on my problem because in the past the more i tried the worse it got, it just came back and smacked me in the face. But its great to be able to tell ppl properly and talk about it. Especially to get advice that isnt "just exercise more" your insights have been really helpful.

Thnx

though the thought of food still plagues my mind 24/7 I try but it takes over my life

i dont have any of the problems listed above, but i love food, i think about food alot. when i am really stressed i eat really late at night around 2 or 3 in the moring.
i used something called hoodia with green tea. it is a herb which suppresses your appetite, it makes you not want food, it even desensitize you sense of smell. for example if smoeone was cooking a juicy steak in front of you, you wont smell it, or even want it.
i also suggest researching a website that i talks about, blogs about, helps people with this disorder. i think that will help a little.