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Abusive possessive fiancé

My cousin is engaged to her boyfriend she has been with for a little bit over a year now. She's 24 and 2 months pregnant and her fianc was in the Marines training for a couple of months and they were planning on getting married sometime this month. After he came back, they started arguing more and on Tuesday he slapped her in the face because of something she said that he thought she was trying to hurt him personally. She knows that he's going around trying to talk to and meet other women and has confronted him about that too. He becomes paranoid all the time trying to control her and seeing who she is always with. He has trust issues. I'm afraid of how her situation is going to be. She doesn't have a stable job right now. I just don't know how I can help her.

Also, the problem is no one except her parents, siblings and I know about her being pregnant. And she plans to keep it that way until she is married. She's not currently living with him right now. She's living with her parents. She doesn't want to call the police because she's afraid her parents will worry. Her fiancs mother knows about it but cannot really do much. I personally think he has mental issues. He's seems very abusive and controlling. He can become angry easily.
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First Helper Nina586
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replied December 23rd, 2011
The best thing you can do for your cousin is be supportive. You can also help her with a 'safety plan' which typically will include having a code word (when you hear the code word you know shes in trouble and you need to go to her), having a spare cell phone he doesn't know about (even if it is disconnected she will still be able to call 911), Having a bag packed and hidden in the car or somewhere easily accessible, if they are arguing try to avoid rooms in the house where he can grab a weapon (staying out of the kitchen in case he grabs a knife). These are some helpful tips to try and stay safe in an abusive relationship.
Encourage her to get a stable job, money is a vital resource she will need if she decides to leave him. It is unusual for abusers to get physical before marriage. The fact he has already hit her is very concerning. Things will only escalate from there.
Once the child is born that adds another layer. When there are children involved it becomes much more difficult to get out.
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