A recent article that appeared on the Bloomberg Business Week website had me in a complete state of apoplexy [pass me the Paxil] so comical so that I nearly chewed off the side of the couch arm.
The antidepressant market... or those that find unique ways to push the poison pills, are always on the lookout for innovative ways to sell their wares. None more so than the latest from the school of the ridiculous and the latest scam offering patients a safety procedure before they take their drugs, like every good little person should.
Thee companies, namely, CNS Response Inc. (CNSO), AssureRx Health Inc. and Brain Resource Ltd. (BRRZY), are rolling out the latest in bio-technology. You are just going to love this...
The brain scan, offered by CNS, apparently works by matching electrical activity thats recorded in the brain. From this, it is claimed, a medication can be prescribed that is just right for you.
"If a number of people with similar brain waves do well on the same medicine, then that drug will probably work for the new patient as well", CNS Chief Executive Officer George Carpenter said.
The article also quotes Mark Schiller, a San Francisco-based psychiatrist.
Ive had a number of patients tell me its really been life changing.
Theyve been in treatment for God knows how many years, never got the right medication, and suddenly we got the right medication and theyre no longer suicidal.
Wait a minute, is Schiller actually saying that the previous meds these people were on made them suicidal?
One thing Schiller definitely isn't saying is that he is director of medical affairs for CNS Response, Inc which provides the technology he is referring to.
Schiller practices out of the MindTherapy Clinic in California, his specialties include, addiction, adoption, anxiety or fears, attention deficit (ADHD), child or adolescent depression, divorce, domestic abuse, domestic violence, eating disorders, infertility, life coaching, loss or grief, obsessive-compulsive (OCD), relationship issues, substance abuse, trauma and PTSD, dissociative disorders, impulse control disorders, personality disorders and psychosis.
So, pretty much all bases covered then.
With more and more people speaking out against these drugs and with lawsuits being filed all over America it's hardly surprising that some white-coated organisation has come up with a remedy...as a pre-cursor to a remedy... that isn't really a remedy at all.
The chemical imbalance theory has been debunked - now we have the electrical activity thats recorded in the brain to target the pill pushers.
Psych: I've recorded your electrical activity and Prozac or Paxil just isn't for you. Counting the electrical impulses and adding a multiplication of 7, because there's 7 days in a week, I recommend that you take Celexa because others with the same electrical pattern as you are also on it.
Patient: Thanks God.
Psych: Oh, I'm not God...I'm just second to him.
Hubble, bubble, toil and trouble.
Gotta fly, need to contact someone who can reupholster the arm of my couch.
The wacky article can be seen in full HERE.